30 March 2009

New York and California... 30th March


I do apologise for my absence with regards to the blog however one has been somewhat busy haha. When I last wrote I said how I was in the process of organising going to Los Angeles whilst Gabrielle made arrangements with work. That was easier said than done. With it being the end of fashion week her presence were required, it goes without saying that Gabrielle did not care in the slightest whether she was needed... She did not want to be there, end of story. Whilst out shopping I recieved a message from Gabrielle saying I despise this wretched job! They are under the illusion that I am currently running errands - lunch? I met her in Pastis and discussed going to Los Angeles. Me being the bad influence I am sent a message to my father's Personal Assistant telling her to book two flights and then instructed Gabrielle to tell them of her departure. Whilst dining she recieved a phone call and said "ugh, it's the bain of my life calling... Hello... No, I'm out to lunch... For crying out loud if you think I care then you are mistaken. What's more I would like to inform you that I am going to Los Angeles regardless of whether you forbid me or not. I am willing to continue working for the company in Los Angeles offering my networking skills and contacts for your benefit however nor would I mind leaving the company and working for a rival, offering my beneficial qualities to them." She then put on a smile and happily said "Either way I don't mind. The choice is yours dear." She turned off her phone, cleared her throat and said "Well, not quite the outcome I was intending on, nevertheless, I am extremely thankful. I have no job!! Now for heavens sake let's go to America!" 


Whilst in a town car on the way back to The Plaza Gabrielle received an E-mail from my mother saying I have just been informed of your resignation/dismissal from your internship. Gabrielle I am not impressed. I shall speak to you about this later x Gabrielle just said "How on earth did she find out a matter of minutes afterwards?" She then received another from my father saying Gabrielle what is this your mother tells me of your dismissal from your internship? At which point I received a message on my IM from my father saying Kyle have been subjecting your sister to your bad influence again? Why is it that when you happen to be with her she gets fired from the job she has been working surprisingly well at for quite some time now?  Gabrielle laughed at this scandalous message to which I replied I may have known I would somehow be dragged into this. No father I am not to blame and in order to prove you wrong I shall aid her in finding a new internship whilst in Los Angeles. I sent that and then added ... We're going to Los Angeles in a few hours. Could you inform the house keeping staff in Beverly Hills please? 


Gabrielle recieved a rather lengthy lecture from my mother whilst on the way to the airport however paid no attention what so ever. Instead she focused her attention on messing with the new diamond I-Phone she received as a birthday present from someone at her party and merely said "Yes mother.. Why of course" at various points throughout my mother's speech. It was mid afternoon and Gabrielle and I were exhausted when we arrived in Los Angeles.  Having only been to the Beverly Hills home once before my memory of the house was that of a rather lived in home with extreme potential. My mother being the woman that she is obviously did not settle for a home which could possibly be described as 'lived in' thus, after going through the electric gates and down the new heated marble driveway the house looked a little different. This was nothing. Once inside the entire interior had changed. A new kitchen had been fitted, new staircase, the pool modernised, walk in-wardrobes had been created, an extremely contemporary spacious office behind a glass wall with a curving desk fitted with two Apple computers and at the other end of the room a meeting area, what's more all of the bedrooms were completely redecorated (mine all black with mirrored furnishings, including a four poster bed.) It was divine! When we entered the house, prior to our explore, there were a number of items placed on the island in the kitchen. There was a note which read We realise we may have been slightly harsh on the pair of you with regards to Gabrielle's decision. We do apologise. Love Mum and Dad xx For Gabrielle there was a new Jimmy Choo leopard print handbag and for myself I received a piece of luggage from the new Gucci British collection. I phoned them to thank them and then went to bed haha. 


In the morning I woke early and went running through the Hollywood Hills with Gabrielle and then returned to the house to shower and change. I just put on a tracksuit as Gabrielle came downstairs and said "Can we go to a spa somewhere?" I went to the garage to get out the car, but neither Gabrielle or I liked it. It's a Bmw X6 - I do believe my parents purchased it just for keeping here as it fits plenty of luggage in. We made the decision to hire a more attractive automobile thus we phoned Jackie (my father's p.a) in order to acquire the address of a car hire place. We decided upon a Bentley convertible after much thought and drove ourselves to the spa. We resulted in spending the majority of the afternoon there and then made a joint decision to have a night out. 


I put on a John Varvastos shirt with a pair of grey Karl Largerfeld pants and some Gucci shoes whilst Gabrielle wore a rather short modified blue sequined backless dress by Pinko with black tights and some Louis Vuitton tribal shoes. I searched my phone book for contacts in Los Angeles and sent a few messages to those who I remembered and then drove Gabrielle and myself to The Mondrian hotel where the car was taken and we went up to the Skybar. Inside the bar was abundant with glamourous clientele however no one who I recognised. People stared at Gabrielle and I as we passed and took a seat by the bar. We ordered some drinks and a rather good looking male leant over and said "British and beautiful, some-" Gabrielle butted in and said "Well noticed. Now let's not dwell as I have no longing to hear the second part of your sentence. I doubt it's going to be anything which will make me remotely inclined to do so much as have a conversation with you, never mind anything else" he then said "and stuck up too" she looked at him with a smile on her face and said "We have already established that your observational skills are more than adequate, there is no need for you to emphasize my point. Now if you'd be so kind as to go away. Your presence alone is making me want to leave." 


After a few drinks Gabrielle and I were sat talking and a girl passed who was dressed rather nicely, she looked at me in a flirtatious way then looked at Gabrielle and her face dropped before lighting up again and coming over. She said "Babe!" Gabrielle returned her hug and looked at me blankly, I merely shrugged my shoulders as I had no idea who she was either, the girl went on "I spotted your boyfriend here and when I saw you I thought, bitch! But then I realised it was you" Gabrielle said "He's my brother, not my boyfriend" her face lit up and she said "Oo" Gabrielle then crushed her dreams once more when she added "and he's homosexual" her face dropped once again and she said "Oh fucking hell! I spotted you at Gabrielle's party but I was with my boyfriend and couldn't get rid of him so I couldn't introduce myself and when I was finally with the girls I couldn't find you. May I say that that was one fan-fucking-tastic party, wouldn't you agree Gabrielle?" She said "Well not quite the description I would use however yes t'was exceptionally good" "Fucking hell, you have good taste, Kyle is it?" I had no time to answer "That was better than some of the partys we throw at work and that's our job! Anyway Gabrielle, how is work?" Gabrielle said "Well.." and the girl barked "Don't tell me you fucking quit!" Gabrielle blinked and moved her head backwards with every syllable and then said "Yes I quit.." Gabrielle looked a little scared and the girl, once again, continued "Well, you don't seem the kind of girl who likes having a boss but wh-" Gabrielle looked disgusted and said "Excuse me? What are you insinuating?" The silence was blissful however it didn't last long and then she barked "Oh nothing babe! Just you seem like a daddy's rich girl who had a nanny when she was little you know the kind.." This was comical haha. Gabrielle still looked disgusted and said "Well, evidently first impressions do count and seeing as I still, despite having just endured this conversation, don't know who you are" she looked her up and down "my first impressions of you aren't so ravishing." Gabrielle gave a 'bitchy' no-teeth smile and said "Now I do believe there is no reason for this conversation to continue. Good evening" Gabrielle turned back towards an extremely entertained me and took a sip of her cocktail and looked at her i-phone and said "Oh marvellous" It was only then that the dumbfounded girl walked away, Gabrielle watched her walk away and then said "Cow! How dare she. What's more she is far too big to look good in Herve Leger!" I laughed and said "Nevertheless Gabrielle, all what she said is entirely true" she said "Yes Kyle I am aware of that but I do not need to be told by other people do I?" At that point a few friends - Jamie, Jodie, Elisha, Cassie, Holly and Jake arrived. Jodie works for a record label, Elisha, Cassie and Jamie are models and Jake works in finance for one of the fashion houses. All very attrictive of course. Jamie took a seat and said "So.. I'm thinking get drunk here then off to meet the others in Area." Gabrielle and I had already had a couple of drinks each thus we stayed off the hard liquor. 


Once they had sucessfully intoxicated themselves and Gabrielle was wanting to dance and could not stop laughing we decided we were somwhat drunk and to go elsewhere. We ended up being in a club named Element and due to the Black American Express cards which Gabrielle and I possessed we walked straight in and received VIP treatment (just the way I like it.) Our table was excellently situated within the nightclub enabling us to catch everyone's attention as they passed haha. All night we were seeing people who Gabrielle and I knew which was good, and then it got better haha. Gabrielle and I were stood at the bar talking and she burst out laughing and said "Kyle, do excuse me if I am mistaken, however is that the boy who claims the title of being your only boyfriend ever stood behind you?" I was a little shocked and turned to see him. Laughing, I caught his eye and his face dropped. His name was Stephen and he looked better than I remembered, last I heard he was doing promotion events for Aussie Bum... Inevitably he was overwhelmingly good looking and well equipped seeing as he was so privelidged in becoming my boyfriend haha. That was a number of years ago now... Being my somewhat intoxicated self I walked over laughing to myself and went and said hello. He introduced me to his friends as "Kyle McQuillan. I was his first boyfriend however the relationship only lasted, how long was it Kyle, 2 days? And he managed to cheat on me twice in such a short space of time. Have you come to tell me you've changed your ways?" I laughed and said "Well, firstly it was a day and half" I was slurring "and secondly, you were my first and last boyfriend. What's more, I have not changed my ways, I still have the same intercourse pattern consisting of several different people per week" I smiled and he and all his friends began laughing. I then put my arm around his shoulder and added "I suggest we have a little catch up this evening" I could see Gabrielle curled over in fits of laughter staring at me on the phone to someone. Writing this I am cringing haha. It is safe to say that my inhibitions were non-existant... Stephen laughed and said "You really haven't changed have you? Unfortunately Kyle I have a boyfriend..." I rolled my eyes and said "Yes, what difference does that make?" his friends began laughing once more and he said "This is why we ended our relationship Kyle, because of things like this, I do not want that to happen with my current boyfriend..." I said "Please! A relationship? Stephen, that was no such thing. We only had sex four times in the space of the two days for crying out loud. When I'm in a relationship I expect it to be more frequent than that... It was just sex with the added label of 'boyfriend.' Anyway, what does it matter" he replied with "Kyle, that boyfriend of mine is stood right over there" he pointed out a man who was ok looking. Someone who I would turn to as a last resort were there nobody else available in a club. I looked back at him and said "You are turning down someone who looks like this for him?" He laughed and said "Ego hasn't shrunk either I see... Grown if anything" I told him I was "Merely stating the facts" and then, for some inexplicable reason, stopped a passing girl who was pretty and said "Excuse me, who would you rather sleep with, him, or me?" She looked at the other man and immediately said me whilst her friend said "I needn't look at anyone else, it would certainly be you" I looked at him and said "You see" then turned back to the girls and said "Can you actually believe this man is turning me down for him?" She started fanning herself and said "Oh jesus... The thought of you two. Excuse me" I turned back to him and said "Honestly Stephen. What is the thought process behind your absurd decision... That girl was about to orgasm on the spot for crying out loud" I heard Gabrielle burst out laughing once more. Stephen also started laughing and said "You are certainly still Kyle McQuillan only with better looks and an expanded ego" I then said "Yes and you asked me out then and loved the sex then. I can assure you it will be far better now" I whispered in his ear "That's a promise" and then before he had chance to protest, kissed him. When I got back to Gabrielle she was still laughing and I took her with me to find the others and said "I will sleep with him tonight Gabrielle. I can assure you of that." 


I didn't see Gabrielle for the rest of the night and text her saying I have no idea where you are and have no longing to search through this mass of people to find you... See you at the house x. Later on, whilst I was in the midst of the crowd dancing someone came behind me and whispered "Let's go" haha, t'was Stephen. I said "I knew you'd come back haha. What happened to the boyfriend?" He said "Don't worry about him, I'll deal with that tomorrow" he was kissing my neck and it was amazing haha. I took him to the bar and flashed my card to get the attention I wanted and then ordered a rather large, expensive bottle of something (I think it was Vodka, I am unsure) and asked Stephen what number his table was enabling me to send it to his boyfriend. I also told the waitress to say it was from his 'admirer' haha. I phoned a car and went outside with Stephen to wait for it to arrive. I don't know what I was doing but all of a sudden I heard Gabrielle shout "Kyle!" I turned around and she was about a metre in front of me and shouted "présage!" A lift in ballet involving me catching her and lifting her at arms length over my head. Usually rehearsed as opposed to given a fraction of a second's notice. I of course only realised what she was saying after she'd jumped and so she just flew into me and the pair of us went plummeting to the ground. I think she may have landed on her feet I am unsure however I certainly did not. I lay there for a second and then said "Ouch... Minor concussion." Before Stephen pulled me off the floor and said "Come on, car's here." I was in pain! Gabrielle was repeatively trying to apologise, only she couldn't get her words out for laughter. 


The driver dropped Gabrielle off at a hotel and took myself and Stephen back to the house. Once at the door I checked my pockets and then said to Stephen "Erm, do you have my keys?" he looked at me and said "Kyle, tell me you are joking" I replied "No, quite serious.. I don't have them" he said "Kyle although you may not like to admit it you are just like your sister." I meanwhile took out my phone and he asked who I was ringing I told him Jackie and he asked who she was to which I relied "My father's assistant" he said "Oh is she nearby?" I said "No, she's in England" and he laughed and said "Merely supporting my point..." I punched him and he came behind and wrapped his arms around me and began kissing my neck at which point Jackie answered and I slurred something along the lines of "It doesn't matter" and went round the the back of the house with Stephen. We collapsed onto one of the four poster beds which were around the pool... I needen't go into detail of what happened next as it goes without saying that it was overwhelmingly amazing! 


I woke at 5 o'clock stark naked on the bed with Stephen (also naked) lying next to me. I was freezing, still drunk with a huge lump on the back of my head! He must have felt me fidgeting as he shot up and almost scared me half to death. Once awake he too was freezing and stood up to search for his clothes which had been flung in every direction however jumped into the pool instead. I said "Shall we try and break into the house?" He said "I'm sure that things such as break ins were taken into consideration when building this house and all the necessary things have been done in order to make it almost impossible to do... Come here, I can think of something to keep us warm" I stood up and stumbled a little as I wrongly presumed I would have regained my balance which was clearly a mistake and then got into the pool to join Stephen and what do you know. We were off again haha. 


By the time we had stopped I was like a dried up Satsuma I was so wrinkly. I jumped out of the pool and grabbed my phone and rang Gabrielle to tell her to hurry and come home because I had lost my keys to which she said "Where have you been all night?" I replied "... On the beds outside, experiencing a minor case of hyerthermia, now do be quick." She said "I shall I shall, I have no reason to stay here anyway, he wasn't all that good. How was Stephen?" I told her I would talk to her about it later and she hung up. 


I remained in the pool with Stephen whilst we waited for Gabrielle to come as it was heated and somewhat warmer than outside. About 15 minutes later Gabrielle was at the doors which lead out to the pool area knocking as she didn't know how to open them. I tried to help her but I couldn't get out of the pool as I was naked so I phoned her and said "Gabrielle it's really not that hard" she stomped her foot and said "Kyle, this rather challenging! Why we have to have such complicated door mechanisms I will never know. Oh sod it, just come through the front door" I said "Christ! Well just go upstairs so that you don't witness your older brother naked" she looked at me and said "KYLEEE! Not in the pool!" I told her we didn't have sex and we were just swimming. Lies haha. She's blonde and gullable though which works to my advantage sometimes. I put my underwear on (which almost instantly went see through, white - not advisable when dripping wet) and went upstairs. Stephen used my shower and I went to use the ensuite in one of the guestrooms, however went back to my bathroom to get my toiletries from the shower... Stephen was already in there showering and looking rather attractive whilst doing so. Neither of us could resist... 


By the time I was finished in the shower Gabrielle had already changed, dried her hair and done her makeup and was sitting in the drawing room. Stephen and I went down, him wearing my clothes and sat with her, discussing the previous night. It was then that I was told of Gabrielle sending me flying to the floor, I then began to feel the pain as I rubbed my hand over the rather large bump haha. I offered Stephen a lift home which he accepted and then Gabrielle said "Oh, let me get those shoes out of the car first." I went and got some sunglasses from my room and then went outside. When I got there Gabrielle had her back to the garage with her legs open, holding the handle and pulling upwards towards her. I watched for a moment and then she changed positions and turned the face the garage, placing one shoe against the door and pulled. I then decided, after her providing me with some humour that it was time to intervene. I went over and typed the code into the keypad which was disguised in the wall at which point the garage opened automatically and she said "Oh." She opened the boot to reveal three handbags and a pair of shoes. Already she had managed to litter it. She removed her Laboutin shoes and threw them into the boot and swapped them for the Gucci ones she got out. At that point the phone began to ring and I heard a pip at the gates of the house. Rather than going back inside to see who it was I pressed the button on my keys to open the gates and a BMW came down the drive with it's roof down and a male sat in the drivers seat. Gabrielle waved and then said "I shall see you later, I'm going for lunch with Baron." Stephen and I got into the Bentley and put the roof down and then he said "Was that Paris Hilton's brother?" I replied "Yes Stephen, it was" and accelerated somewhat rapidly down the sloping, bending driveway. About 5 minutes into the journey Stephen said "Are you purposely trying to get pulled over?" I told him to be quiet and made no attempt of slowing. When we got to Stephen's house I said goodbye and then did something which is totally unheard of, I gave him my number haha. 


I went back to the house and went in the gym for a couple of hours and then went running around the hills. Following this I went shopping for a short while and purchased 6 pairs of sunglasses and a pair of shoes and then went back to the house. When Gabrielle got dropped off again by Barron bearing some 15 bags and threw them all in the foyer and said "I'm going for a dance... You haven't left the gym in a mess have you?" I said "That was rather random" she said "Actually not, look what Hannah just sent me" she showed me a picture on her phone of one of her friends stood on one foot with the other bending upwards touching her head whilst holding a glass of wine, the subtext read Are you out in New York this evening? she then showed me a message from Elliot in which there was a picture of him on an ice skating rink, mid jump/spin where the subtext read Come back to London! x. My parents had strategically designed the gym so that it doubled as a dance studio for Gabrielle enabling her at times like these to leap around the room to her heart's content. 


For the rest of the following week we didn't do all that much. I recieved a message from Stephen saying Excellent! The boyfriend correctly presumed I had slept with someone else seeing as I disappeared from sight and I wasn't in my apartment when he went round. As you can imagine he ended it... I replied saying Come round to celebrate! He messaged back with a short Kyle... and I said  I would like to say I'm sorry however I am not... I enjoyed myself far too much! In my view it is a change for the better... Would you look at that. You cheated on a boyfriend, that makes you as bad as me haha. Gabrielle went out to do some shopping with Baron again last Saturday whilst I met with a male friend (not Stephen - someone else.) When she returned, once again with many shopping bags she said "Ugh, guess what I have gone and done like a complete imbecile!" I asked what whilst all sorts of things such as crashing a car, leaving her bag somewhere or accidently tripping and breaking something in a shop rushed through my head then she said "Got a job! I don't know why I did it!" I could breathe "I had university ringing me up moaning as usual and Baron said he'd come with me because then it's showing that I do infact have good contacts and it went rather well. I start a week on Monday..." My phone started ringing and it was Jackie. I answered "Hey Jackson!" she said "Hello there Kyle. Are you with your sister? If yes, put me on loudspeaker." I did so and she continued "Your parents were planning on surprising you however I thought it would be best to forewarn you. They will be landing in LAX in about 3 hours time. Knowing what the pair of you are like I thought it would be best to let you know so that you can evict sleeping partners from the house and perhaps make an attempt of cleaning up..." I looked around the room at the shoe boxes which were on the floor, the shoes, I had left about 3 hoodies on the floor thus it wasn't too tidy. I said "Jackson, don't be so absurd. Ring the house keeper" she said "Of course how idiotic of me, I shall do so now. Are you both aware that - please excuse me, I must be having an off day evident from all of these stupid comments, of course you don't know it's Mothering Sunday tomorrow" Gabrielle said "Arr really... What have you got her?" she replied "Gabrielle I have not got your mother anything as she is not my mother. I often wonder how the pair of you survive by yourselves..." I laughed and said "Jackson you do realise that I have the authority to dismiss you" she merely replied "Kyle, use your brain. Think of the effects of making such an idiotic rash decision. You would have to teach everything and win someone else over so that they warned you of surprise visits from your parents etcetra. I am quite simply the pinnacle of personal assistants. Without me, neither of you would have phones, your parents would know about the countless times you have crashed their cars and I have had them fixed unknowing to them, they would have walked in on you actively having sex (especially you Kyle) hundreds of times, neither of them would have recieved birthday, wedding anniversary, mothers day and fathers day gifts ever. You see without me, you really are quite useless" I replied "Yes however without us, you and your husband would not embark on glamourous holidays to Paridise Island, Barbados, Dubai, Beverly Hills and Aspen prior to Christmas as well as all of the other family homes you've visited, you really would not experience a glamourous lifestyle..." she replied "Well as much as I would love to sit and talk to you sweet sweet darlings some of us do work for a living thus I must be going. Good day. Oh, they're bringing your dogs.." she hung up leaving me and Gabrielle with excitement for Maddox and Bambi's arrival. My mother took Bambi back to London post Gabrielle's party.


The house keeper arrived in good time to tidy the house whilst Gabrielle and I drove to the shops to search for something for my mother. After much discussion during my rather speedy journey to Rodeo Drive we decided the easiest thing to do would be to purchase my mother an entire outfit. We went in what seemed like more or less every shop and eventually purchased an Oscar De La Renta silk dress along with a pair of the Lucy Platforms by Gucci and a Fendi clutch all in all coming in at just short of four and a half thousand haha. 


When we got back to the house we were getting out of the car when two blacked out SUV's pulled up behind us - mother and father had arrived. Gabrielle completely forgot to act surprised like the imbecile that she is however our excitement for seeing the dogs seemed to hide our knowledge of their arrival rather well. After greeting one another my mother went inside and said "So, do you approve of the decor?" Gabrielle and I both told her we adored it and she said "I am extremely surprised to see that the house has remained tidy, although Kyle, why is there a shoe flung in the back garden?" I tried to think why when I recalled the rather active sex Stephen I had outside, presumably it got kicked off during the intercourse thus I non-chalently said "I have no idea..." Gabrielle then spoke up and said "Guess what!" My parents looked at each other with a complete lack of enthusiasm, evidently dreading what she was about to say when she said "I got another job!" The tone in which she told them differed somewhat to the tone in which she told me haha. My mother said "Oh marvellous Gabrielle, I am so glad you did so! Where is the job located?" Gabrielle said "Here so I shall be moving for a while. I may have to fly back to New York to collect some belongings first though." All of a sudden she was angel child. My father said "Well seeing as we've arrived and you have a new job we ought to do something to celebrate. What do you suggest?" Gabrielle screamed "MALIBU!" and my father said "Very well, I must go for a short meeting in the city first however I shan't be any longer than a couple of hours. My father left in the chauffeur driven SUV which was still outside whilst my mother had a rather lengthy discussion with someone about work and I played with Maddox. I got repetitively told by my mother to stop making him hyperactive by chasing him around the house and then whilst having a play fight with him Gabrielle said "Oh Kyle! Please grow up" whilst she lay on the couch giving caviar to Bambi whilst talking to her like she was a baby, I would have come back with something only Maddox begin to tighten his jaw around my forearm haha. 


At around half past 5 my father returned and due to him telling my mother we would have a prompt departure to Malibu I went outside after Gabrielle to put my cases into the car. However there was one more car. In the short time my father had been out he had collected/purchased a black Lambourghini Gallorado for Gabrielle. When she got outside the front door she screamed and my father stepped out of the car and said "Here you go darling, well done for taking it upon yourself to get another job.." At this my jaw dropped. I could not believe she was getting a car for simply getting a job! It was completely absurd. I was not impressed! My mother then joined us outside and said "Gabrielle we do expect you to stick at it now and peresevere through times of boredom and stress." Gabrielle continued with her excitement whilst my blood began to boil. My father noticed my obvious frustration over the issue and came over to say "Kyle, don't be a brat now. It is important we encourage her." I began to protest and he merely shushed me and said "What's more, for your twenty-first you got one of the largest apartments in the Plaza which was somewhat more expensive than what Gabrielle got." I said "Father, I got an apartment she got a house and now a car for simply getting a job. A job which she only got because of her social status, it's not as though she has had to work exceptionally hard in order to get it!" With that I stormed inside and went to my room. I was rather annoyed. Once upstairs I rooted through my suitcases and found the Hermes address book entitled California... My Black Book. I took that along with my ipod and phone and went back downstairs. I put my suitcase in the boot of the Bentley, put Maddox on the back seat and got in the car. My mother said "Aren't you going to go in the car with Gabrielle, we can take Maddox" I replied "No, I shall meet you there. You all drive far too slow and besides, I'd much rather be alone." I put the roof down, plugged my I-pod in and turned up the stereo before accelerating rather quickly past them all without saying another word. I saw my mother and father look at each other in the mirror... Swines! 


During my drive to Malibu I phoned Elliot to moan at him. Once I'd told him he failed to comprehend why I was in a mood merely saying "and..." This was not what I wanted to hear. I barked "What do you mean and Elliot?! Are you completely retarded?" I was getting myself more worked up so I just turned off the phone and threw it on the seat then turned the music up even louder and accelerated even more. I pulled over at one point to put the roof up as I was getting rather cold and then took the opportunity to phone Elliot back. When I picked up my phone and had a message off my mother saying "Kyle drive safely please and do try to not be in a mood." I also had 9 other messages from friends asking whether I was in Milan, Rome, Madrid, Barcelona and London to see whether I would go out haha. Elliot answered the phone and I said "I'm sorry..." he said "It's quite all right, I have developed a thick skin after suffering countless tantrums on your half. Nevertheless Kyle I do believe you are over reacting slightly. Your father was right, your apartment will have cost an awful lot more than Gabrielle's house" I said "So, she had an enormous flamboyant party" to which he replied "As did you Kyle in a sense..." We spent time in New York followed by a while in Miami then sailing around the Caribbean on that enormous yacht if I do recall. Your parents paid for all of that including the £5,000+ we spent on beverages between us on a nightly basis." Very true, then he added "And how many cars do you have at home?" I replied "5" and he said "Yes and Gabrielle has two... Now please be reasonable, you know your parents will make it up to you anyway, they always do." Correct again. I asked what he was doing this evening and said "Not a lot, it's rather boring here, people are all over the place due to mother's day and Easter etc." I asked him to fly out to Beverly Hills and he said "I may just do so, I shall see about booking a flight for tomorrow. Failing that I shall get a jet." I then said "Well prior to your departure will you go to my house and get my skiing attire. I think it my clothes may be in one of the walk-in's on the third floor and my skiis and snowboard are in the kitchen cupboard I think behind the shoe boxes oh and bring my goggles from the oven or if they're not in there try the cabinet in your room, well, the room you often sleep in should I say. If you are unable to find it then it is not to worry, I shall simply buy new things. Do ensure you bring your own things too, I feel a trip to Mammoth would be good..." 


I sent a message to a man named Josh who was described as Part time model/personal trainer, amazing in bed, met at Kelly Kutrone's party. Spends weekends with clients in Malibu. Owns beach house. from my Black Book. Once I had reminded him of where we met he immediately jumped at the offer to meet up. Thankfully he was at his beach house so, after inspecting Gabrielle's new home (which was absolutely gorgeous!) I left Maddox and my suitcase and went round. 


A few hours later I returned to the house where Gabrielle's new Lambourghini was parked and went inside. My mother and father were sat watching television and Gabrielle was on the balcony in the midst of a phone call. My father made an attempt at lightening my mood by saying "Who was the lucky chap of the past few hours this time then?" My mother shot him a look which he fully understood as he immediately shut up and then she said "Are you ok my dear?" I told her I was fine, I simply could not be bothered dwelling on the fact I was in a bad mood and changed the subject to inform them that Elliot was arriving. Upon me telling my father that we may go skiing in Mammoth he said "Arghh... Allow me to join you! When will you be going?" I told him I didn't know and he said "Well do inform me... Your mother and I are required in Las Vegas at some point next week... We are aiding with the prevention of a hotel closure via investment. Isn't that spiffing?!" Not really... Although, having a rather hefty share in what I imagine to be a rather good hotel in Las Vegas means I may have as many friends as I want there and garuntee the penthouse suite haha. 


Maddox was driving me insane jumping up to chest height through excitement of being near the beach thus I went and put on a pair of shorts and a low v-neck t-shirt and went running with him for a short while. T'was rather fun haha. We raced one another by me throwing a stick and making him wait and then shouted "Go!" and the pair of us raced to get it, on this rare occasion I won however as soon as I returned upright with the sick in my hand maddox jumped and took it back and continued running haha. Gabrielle then appeared out of nowhere and said "I think I'll beat you in a race Kyle.." I laughed and she said "Ok, let's have one" I agreed to the little challenge, although I was a little apprehensive. It had been a while since I had actually raced Gabrielle, usually we just jog together... She picked up a piece of branch and said "We'll run to this" she threw it and it landed a couple of metres from her feet, she just said "Oh... Here Kyle, throw this it'll go far." She handed me her blackberry, which, at her demand I threw. We got ready and I heard my father shout "Go Gabrielle! Do us all a favour and bruise his ego!" Swine, Gabrielle called back "Oh I shall father." I was now determined to win. We set off going at exactly the same speed, I was sprinting and I believed Gabrielle was too, however once we were about a third of the way to the phone she sped up and went right past me, I did likewise however she was now going quicker and was a fair bit ahead of me and before I knew it we were at The Blackberry. Gabrielle hadn't realised this of course and was still running into the distance like an idiot haha. I shouted her and she realised and came walking back holding her breasts. I asked what was wrong and she said "Breast pain... I almost knocked my self out with them" she then moaned for a while and said "You'll have to carry me back I'm afraid, I can't walk" I said "Gabrielle do be serious dear" she put her arm around my neck and jumped her legs up for me to catch which I did and carried her inside. Once on the balcony she said "Maddox, wait there" and I went inside and placed Gabrielle on the couch then went outside and showed and example of shaking to Maddox to make him do likewise which he did and then brushed his legs. We didn't do all that much for the remainder of the evening.


In the morning I woke rather late and went downstairs to see my mother with Gabrielle. When we got downstairs my mother was in gym clothes and juding by the sand on her feet she had been running. We said "Happy mother's day" to which she replied "Well you do surprise me, I didn't think you would remember, thank you darlings" I went to get her presents from the boot of the Bentley. She absolutely adored the outfit which she received and kissed us both saying "Thank you" countless times. A short while later the door bell went and Maddox started going balistic. I opened the door and Elliot was stood whilst his chauffeur unloaded countless items of luggage from the SUV. I invited him inside where I asked how he found the house to which he replied "I spoke to Jackie earlier.." and then dived on Maddox. Once in the living area Elliot gave my mother a shopping bag and said "Happy Mothers day Camilla! I do apologise for the intrusion." She said "Oh Elliot don't be absurd. You're welcome any time. You needn't get me a present!" She opened the Gucci bag and pulled out a shoe box and then took out a pair of the new Iman triple ankle strap platforms which she loved and then hugged and kissed him. Angel child haha. Whilst my mother and Gabrielle had a conversation Elliot whispered in my ear "I've just stepped off an eleven hour flight thus my needs are somewhat self explanitory... Let's go to a hotel." I asked my mother non-chalantely what she was doing and she said "Well Gabrielle and I are meeting with the interior designer at The Ivy in Los Angeles, I think your father may come with us. Why do you ask?" I just told her no reason and went upstairs to change. I didn't really end up changing though as you can imagine. Not long into the enjoyable little session I heard my mother shout "Kyle dear" not far from my closed door. I jumped upright and then Elliot jumped off the bed and ran into the ensuite whilst I bent my whole body downwards towards my straightened out legs in order to hide a certain something from my mother's eyes. She opened the door and said "Kyle what on earth are you doing" I just replied "Stretching" and she said "Very well. The three of us are going out now so we shall see you when we return." Once we heard her go back downstairs Elliot came back out and said "Christ!" I said "I know. I feel like a seventeen year old again!" We picked up from where we left off and continued for the majority of the afternoon..." 


Later that day my father messaged me to say that we were going out for a meal for mother's day and that they had purchased outfits and would change at The Beverly Hills home thus we were to meet them at the restaurant. I replied asking what car they had gone in and my father said "We all went in the Bentley, why do you ask?" I then messaged Gabrielle asking permission to drive to Los Angeles in her new car, she reluctantly agreed haha. Prior to leaving my father said "What do you suppose we go straight to Mammoth after the meal? Bring the Bmw and all of your attire. I shall purchase mine there..."  With that Elliot put mine and his skiis in the boot of the Bmw along with our ski clothes and we took a couple of cases. Following this I gave the keys to the Bmw to him and told him I would meet him at the restaurant. Meanwhile I got in the Lambourghini (which isn't a patch on mine, not as fast either... Mine is Versace for crying out loud haha.) Whilst on the way Elliot messaged me to ask how fast I was going as I had just sped past him haha, I replied saying It's the car, it's the car! 


We had a lovely meal and afterwards we all got ready for our departure. Elliot, my father and I got in the Bmw and said goodbye to Gabrielle and my mother. I insisted upon driving first to give us a head start and so Elliot took a seat in the back, my father in the front and I drove rather quickly for the next four hours. After this I couldn't be bothered driving anymore as it was too dangerous to go fast (or so I was being told) so my father and I swapped places. When we finally arrived we were all exhausted and my father stopped at The Village Lodge and we all went inside to the lobby. My father handed over his card and said "Two of your best rooms please, Elliot attempted to protest but I just told him to be quiet. Once we had keys we all went to bed. Post intercourse Elliot and I agreed to meet on the slopes in the morning. 


The following morning I left Elliot asleep (still not on Los Angeles time) and ordered some room service whilst speaking to Gabrielle on the phone. She told me how she had taken mum to a hotel last night so they could make use of the spa amenities and then drive back to Malibu following some shopping that afternoon, however, she happened to bump into a man whom she knew and left my mother in the suite alone for her to worry all night of her whereabouts. Inevitably leaving Gabrielle in a somewhat sticky situation this morning haha. Once I had eaten I went with my father to a ski shop to purchase some clothing and skis. Once inside the shop he went to the counter and said "Please could you be so kind as to show me your most expensive ski suit" however, after realising it would take him quite some time to buy it and go back to the hotel in order to change I decided I would simply meet him there. So, Chanel skis in hand I headed up the mountain. 


Whilst at the top of a mountain I recieved a phone call from my father and Elliot to say they were just on the ski lift on their way up when a certain gentleman caught my eye. I looked in his direction and smiled then I hung up and maintained eye contact. He was incredibly good looking! I smiled and put on my Tom Ford sunglasses once again and when I looked to the side the man had put on his googgles and was bending, ready to start on his snowboard... I presumed he was challenging me to a race. I laughed and without hesitation started going down. I added in a few jumps and cut infront of the man several times on the descent and, what do you know, won haha. I went and got back onto the ski lift and once I had taken my seat the man came and sat next to me. I smiled and said "Good attempt chap" he laughed and said "I do believe this was how we met last time Kyle" my initial thought was oh my life, I cannot go anywhere without being in the presence of someone I have slept with when he said "You don't remember do you?" I replied "Not in the slightest, no" he leaned closer and said "Perhaps this will help you to remember" and began kissing me. If it wasn't for the fact that he was very good at kissing I would have vomited there and then through total digust of the line he had just delivered haha. Once he had finished he said "Help at all?" I replied "No, however it did give me insight into what any future experience would be like... Promising" he then went on to suggest that we went to his hotel room, however I declined and said that I would do so once I had skied for the day. I got off the ski lift to see my father looking for me and excused myself from the man, telling him I would see him later when he said "Why the sudden escape?" I replied "Not that I have to explain myself to you however my father is stood over there and doesn't really approve of my promiscuous lifestyle" he looked from me to my father and said "Jeez.. Your Dad is potential sex material, he is hot!" Disgusting. Without another word I went over to my father. The look on his face instigated a smirk on my face and he said "Honestly Kyle. Is there a chance you could stop thinking about your sexual desires for at least a few hours? I am managing fine, I am beginning to think you have some sort of addiction" I replied "Yes father you're old.." he replied "44 Kyle, believe it or not your mother and I still have intercourse." I exclaimed "Err" as I was completely repulsed and then said "That was completely unnecessary father. Please!" he looked rather shocked and said "Kyle, how do you think I feel when I can hear you and Elliot in Malibu yesterday afternoon and again through the walls of the hotel last night?" Oh. My. Life! I almost died. I cringed beyond belief, all the muscles in my neck tightened and my toes curled and then he merely said "Yes Kyle, point obliterated." My father Elliot and I met up again at the bottom of the slope and whilst on the ski lift my father was on the phone to my mum, thus I took the opportunity to talk to Elliot. I turned my back to my Dad and mouthed "He heard us last night!" however he simply said "What are you saying Kyle?" I repeated it and he put his hand over his mouth and then mouthed "Really?" and bit his bottom lip clearly embarrassed to be with my father haha, meanwhile I was doing my best not to audibly laugh and then once I could finally speak said "Twice!" Only to make Elliot's little panic worse and my laughter uncontrollable haha. My father remained on the phone at the top of the hill and Elliot said "Kyle that is horrific!" I said "Oh crikey, calm down! Gabrielle told me once that he walked in on us but neither of us had any idea. It's not the end of the world..." 


That evening I did sleep with the man whom I met on the slopes and Elliot also joined in haha. The following day I had a minor disaster on the slope. Whilst approaching the bottom of the slope my sunglasses fell of which resulted in me being blinded by the sun and then all of a sudden I fell and about 7 children landed on top of me. My legs were spread and I had skis on top of my head and children standing all over me laughing. I too was laughing, and freezing at that, all I had on was a skin tight Lycra thermal t-shirt thing so as you can imagine, the cold was reaching my bones rather quickly haha. I heard Elliot laughing and then take a picture of the vast amount of children on top of me and then the instructor who was responsible for the children helped me up... I slept with him too. 


My father flew back to Los Angeles on Wednesday and met my mother at the airport and then went on to Las Vegas whilst Elliot and I left Mammoth on Saturday afternoon and arrived back in Beverly Hills in the evening. Gabrielle, Elliot, myself and a few others had a couple of marvellous nights out whilst there before returning to London with Maddox and Elliot yesterday. I am now exhausted! 


I currently don't have all that many plans whilst back in London. Upon my parent's return they have a business dinner which isn't terribly exciting however Gabrielle and I have been instructed countless times that we are "required to be there, regardless of prior commitments as it doesn't portray a very good imagine if they don't have the support of their family." I am told there will be all sorts of business men from across London there - how exhilarating... Although, on the plus side, there shall be a room abundant with good looking men (some from the stock market) wearing fine fitting suits. Marvellous!